*To the Mom with the Headstrong Child*
I see you, as you try to guide but not hold on too tight. The apologizing and the frustration, I see you. I’m a mom of two with my oldest being a very bubbly, sweet, firecracker; my sour patch kid whom I adore. Everyone might not get him but I do, he’s a free spirit however extremely determined. “No” is a suggestion in his world, might I also add he’s two. It can get very frustrating daily especially when he’s climbing and jumping off things. Sometimes I know it can feel as if you’re talking to thin air. To that mom of the headstrong child, I’m right here with you, figuring all of this out. This week I decided we would try a new gymnastics class, my child was running every which way but the way his teacher was directing the class to go. As I chased after him wearing my four-month-old, working up a slight sweat I think “this class was for him to curate his craft, this was a good idea right…right?” Now I’m not sure it was a good idea. I’m feeling isolated, all the other kids are enjoying the class why won’t my child just listen. Yes, there is a lot of cool equipment here but please son just listen, I feel the meltdowns coming when he’s told he can’t run out the door for the tenth time. I also see the look a mom gives when he’s throwing the soft bouncy ball and it rolls and hits her, of course, I apologize just praying “please just sit down like the other kids”. My child is not like “other” kids though, he’s very strongwilled and I have to find a way to adjust. We have to find a way to adjust.
Sometimes I wonder if as moms with headstrong children in public do we perceive people judging us when they aren’t judging us at all? Maybe those other moms don’t know what to say either? I promise you we will figure it out. I see his overjoyed smile as he figures out a flip he’s been wanting to try, I see the love he shows towards others when sharing the items in the class. To the mom with the headstrong child you know your baby, you love them more than anything within you but it gets hard sometimes with the constant fights. I would find myself especially during nap time routine saying “why do you have to fight me on everything”. Honesty if I look back I would rather they have a bit of a fighting spirit before I unleash them into the world.
Maybe that strong will could keep them from saying yes to that person that doesn’t want the best for them. To the mom with the headstrong child, I urge you to remember that you ARE doing the right thing and you ARE good enough. You are raising tiny humans that adore you. I currently sit here with my two-year-old hanging off of my shoulder yelling “hi” well past bedtime. It’s frustrating after you work hard to create a routine, try to do the right things, and they still do what feels right to them. “Work with me here kid!” I had to learn to pick and choose my battles. Of course, I would love for him to be sleeping like my other child right now but that’s just not the case. To the mom with the headstrong child, it’s ok to take a knee, you’ve done your best today. When it comes to people judging you they do NOT know your struggle, and I tell you the struggle is real sis. It’s easy to lose yourself raising headstrong little ones but think where they got that amazing will from; their strong mother. That strong mother will make it out of these early years more resilient than ever. Diamonds are made under pressure and we are earning our rocks. To the mom with the headstrong child trying to navigate each day I see you, I am you, and I am proud of you. We will make it through this each day step by step you’ll be able to adjust and move on to the next thing. Consider me your teammate in this, pick and choose your battles mama. Until next time may your wine be stronger than your kids.